so i know that this is an incredibly random post – but let’s be fair, it’s a random blog and you’re still reading it, so i’m guessing i can get away with it, although this might be pushing the boundaries…
today, i was driving home from work and i went past a field filled with cows… nothing unusual i hear you say! the unusual thing was that there was a ditch at the side of the field to stop the cows from walking on the road and one of the herd had taken it upon themselves to try and cross the ditch to get to the road, i know – he wasn’t the brightest in the bunch, poor love! well, he was stood at such an angle, it looked like he was going to trip and fall any second… which got me thinking about cow tipping… (i told you it was random didn’t i?)
now for many years, it’s been believed that some odd people run up to cows when they’re stood sleeping and tip them for fun. firstly, why you would do that, goodness only knows and secondly it’s an urban myth! can you imagine, some guy stood in a bar talking with his work colleagues at the end of a hard week and then all of a sudden piping up with…
“so i went out last night, got completely wasted. was walking home, saw a cow getting a bit of shut eye. saw my opportunity and took it. snook up on him and before you know it, the cow was tipped and lying on the floor. you had to be there, it was side-splittingly funny!”
no, that’s what i thought – me neither. so whilst i was having a random moment, i googled it when i got home, just to see what evidence existed on the subject – i need to get out more, i realise. well some guy (lovely i’m sure) went to the trouble of working out the statistics behind the fine art. apparently the body mass wouldn’t make it that easy! plus apparently they sleep sporadically throughout the day whilst other members of the herd stay awake…
so, if you see a drunk, sneeking up on a cow, please stop them! just for their own self preservation!!!
random post complete, i’m off to research whether tipping a sheep would be easier!
garrett says:
When I was a young lad growing up in the dark depths of Gloucestershire, we used to have great fun tipping them cows! The trick is to get the cow dosed up on Cider… and drive at it with a tractor… *Insert various farmer-esque catch phrases here*
May 14, 2007 at 10:59 pm
fox says:
no no no..a cow is not a he !! Its a she !
And since a mature cow is much stronger than a thuman its best not to go attempting to push one over. Point three, if you upset a nearby bull via your activity you will shit your pants like never before ! Pont four, god help you if the farmer see you attemping this. Ow yeah nearly fogot, a pissed off cow or bull can tossover a landrover, knock down walls and can toss you about like a little doll, all points to remeber. My last point is as follows, the cow maywell be in calf !!
May 15, 2007 at 12:26 am
Sandra W says:
I’m for Georgia and you’re not considered southern unless you’ve tipped a few cows! Great fun
May 15, 2007 at 2:25 am
randommel says:
i’m obviously a cow-tipping novice, it would appear that i’m the only person not to have tipped an unsuspecting moo cow!!
i’m feeling very left out, so i’m putting on my wellies as i type! i’m just going to hope i find a FEMALE calf (wreckoning i stand more chance than with a fully fledged cow) as i don’t fancy being tossed over a landrover, thrown against a wall or tossed like a doll – at least not until the weekend anyway
May 15, 2007 at 5:26 am
stanely the farmer says:
Ya daft buggers !
I recognise that mel bugger, ya know.
Sitting with straw in my mouth waiting for my stew is what I was doing when this lass comes up to me and says “ Im stuck in your field “ “ I said ya don’t look stuck to meâ€
She said “ not to you I meen Im stuck in your field “
I said “ I m joking ya daft silly young sodâ€
I look and I see a bloody funny looking car in the mud.
Ya want a proper car I said.
She said “ I was taking a short cut though your field “
I said “ I can see that ya silly bugger “
Can ya pull me out she said !
I said “ whats it worth lass†as I slap her arse .
I shall let mel herself finish the story.
May 15, 2007 at 1:54 pm